The Barriers & Pitfalls

Barriers and Pitfalls

Romantic relationships are challenging at any age and they are particularly challenging when they are a new part of life.  There are a bunch of natural barriers to overcome and pitfalls to avoid or deal with

Natural Barriers in Teen Romantic Relationships

Knowing what these barriers are makes it easier (but not easy) to deal with them.

  • Inexperience – it’s just new
  • Fear of the unknown – inescapable
  • Awkwardness – no one comes fully equipped to deal with romantic relationships
  • Everyone is a moving target – it’s always a matter of “fit”
  • New emotional landscape – what are these feelings and what do I do with them?
  • Maintaining self-confidence and sense of worth when relationships don’t work – it’s going to happen, so the challenge is to not be diminished

Pitfalls in Romantic Relationships

As with any heroic journey, there are dangers and pitfalls and you can be injured as you find your way.  They may be large or small, but they are survivable and you will get better and better at dealing with them as you gain experience.


  • Emotional distress when things don’t go well
  • Self-doubt
  • Depression or despair
  • Loss of sense of belonging
  • Loss of sense of self-worth
  • Rejection
  • Diminished self-concept and confidence


  • Restricting your web of relationships (too focused on a romantic relationship) – friends and family fall away
  • Impulsive behavior – reacting without enough thought
  • Doing things you don’t want to do under pressure – to be acceptable
  • Giving up who you are to fit in – loss of authentic identity

Far too many people are looking for the right person, instead of trying to be the right person.