What to Do

“OK, I have to form an identity as a young woman or man; develop a new relationship with my parents, new friendships and maybe romantic relationships; and build a whole bunch of competencies.”

So, How do I Manage this Journey I am on as a Teenager?


“I’m supposed to leave the dependence of childhood behind and take on the responsibility of being the author of my life as a young adult.  This is a ten-year journey, full of unknowns and new stuff, with lots of ups and downs along the way.”

How do I do that?  What Can I do?

Six Strategies for Managing the Journey

There are six strategies that can help you become the author and find your way through the challenges of the journey.  The trick is to figure out how to use the strategies to your best advantage.  They are basic strategies, so adapt them, add to them – make them yours.

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”  Mark Twain

The Six Strategies

Each strategy brings benefits and together they can dramatically increase the amount of power and influence you have in creating the life you want.

Strategy #1:  Understand & Face the Challenges Directly

Strategy #2:  Create a Vision & Your Heroic Code

Strategy #3   Put an Action Plan in Place

Strategy #4:  Connect with the Right People – Build a Web of Support

Strategy #5:  Build Capability – Mastery & Habits

Strategy #6:  Persevere – “Hold the Course”

The teen heroic journey is “the” story of being a teenager, yet it plays out in a unique way for everyone.  In a similar fashion the six strategies for managing the journey will need to be adapted and will look different for everyone.

Your strategies will also change to some degree as your journey unfolds and you progress and gain experience and the world around you changes.  That’s just the way it works.

There is Some Seriously Good News

  • These are the same strategies that you can use throughout your adult life, so any practice you get as a teenager, sets you up for success as an adult
  • These strategies may be new to you, but they are very practical, well within your abilities – and they work

Table of Contents

The 6 Strategies

Strategy #1: Understand and Face the Challenges Directly
  • The Three Core Challenges
    • Forming an identity as a young adult
    • Building more mature relationships and connections
    • Developing the competencies of a young adult
  • Understanding and managing the journey
Strategy #2: Create a Vision & Your Heroic Code
  • What’s a vision and why is it important?
  • Creating your vision
  • What’s a heroic code and why is it important?
  • Creating your heroic code
Strategy #3: Put an Action Plan in Place
  • Personal plans
  • Basic elements of a plan
  • Examples of goals and actions
Strategy #4: Connect with the Right People – Build a Web of Support
  • Who can I connect with?
  • Coach people in how to support you
Strategy #5: Build Capability – Mastery & Habits
  • Where much of your power lies
  • OK – Good – Master?
  • The natural steps in mastery – “Learning to love the plateau”
  • We create our habits and then they create us
  • 7 steps to developing a desired habit
Strategy #6: Persevere – “Hold the Course”
  • Sometimes it just comes down to persevering
  • Resilience
  • Strategies for developing resilience
  • The energy traps – challenges to the heart
  • Possible sources of life energy & renewal
  • Check-ins to stay on the path (3 questions)

“It is only when you take responsibility for your life that you discover how powerful you truly are.”  Allanah Hunt

Barriers & Pitfalls

  • “I’m just a teenager. How much of an author can I really be?”
  • “Who am I to have a heroic code or plan for my life as a teenager?”
  • “Will people really support me? Am I worthy of their support?”
  • ”I’m just not mastering all this stuff. I’m falling behind. I’m tired.”
  • “I’m poor and have no resources. I live in a dangerous neighborhood/family. People are pulling me down.”

Act When You Are Ready

You can currently be in any of four groupings based on how ready you are to take on “being the author.” You can also move from one group to another

  1. “Look out world, here I come.”
  2. “Pretty much ready to go, but not quite ready to go full speed”
  3. “On the sidelines, but interested”
  4. “Never going to engage.”

The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.